Stories | Louisville X-press

Hiring Manager Barely Keeping it Together While Talking Up "Fun Working Environment" to Interviewee

Louisville X-Press Staff

Jan 24, 2022

Hiring Manager Barely Keeping it Together While Talking Up "Fun Working Environment" to Interviewee

Hiring Manager for local hot wing establishment, Linda Bancroft, was on the verge of stress-induced maniacal laughter during her...

"Sorry I'm Late, Long Story..." Says Co-Worker Who Simply Overslept

Louisville X-Press Staff

Jan 19, 2022

"Sorry I'm Late, Long Story..." Says Co-Worker Who Simply Overslept

"Dude, it was crazy this morning, I wouldn't even know where to begin," reported area marketing specialist, Dylan Robey, after arriving...

Impotent Rally in DC to Protest Stolen Erections

Louisville X-Press Staff

Jan 6, 2022

Impotent Rally in DC to Protest Stolen Erections

"We just want our boner"

From Louisville X-Press, We Want to Wish Everyone a Very Happy New Ye... Aw Fuck, Betty White Died!

Louisville X-Press Staff

Dec 31, 2021

From Louisville X-Press, We Want to Wish Everyone a Very Happy New Ye... Aw Fuck, Betty White Died!

What a perfect way to end another shit show of a year. It's almost poetic. Really?????

Still Single? New Dating Website Basically Your Last Chance at Love.

Louisville X-Press Staff

Dec 31, 2021

Still Single? New Dating Website Basically Your Last Chance at Love.

Can't find that special connection? Perhaps it's time to consider searching through the Bottom of the Barrel!

Note Above Toilet Paper in Workplace Bathroom Raises Horrifying Questions

Louisville X-Press Staff

Nov 10, 2021

Note Above Toilet Paper in Workplace Bathroom Raises Horrifying Questions

Like, literally "All" paper, regardless of...use?

Lawmakers Include Special Anti-Poverty Measures into Newly Passed Bipartisan Infrastructure Bill

Louisville X-Press Staff

Nov 6, 2021

Lawmakers Include Special Anti-Poverty Measures into Newly Passed Bipartisan Infrastructure Bill

The measure will be explained, in private to select impoverished individuals and offer them a way out of debt, one way or another.

All Woman's Life Events Marked With Car Selfie

Louisville X-Press Staff

Oct 25, 2021

All Woman's Life Events Marked With Car Selfie

From the life-changing to the mundane, all of the area woman's life events are always paired with a solo, un-themed, geographically ambiguou

Breaking: Baggage Mishap Reveals William Shatner Brought Large Volume of Viagra on Space Flight

Louisville X-Press Staff

Oct 20, 2021

Breaking: Baggage Mishap Reveals William Shatner Brought Large Volume of Viagra on Space Flight

A photo from the historic commercial space flight of 90-year-old William Shatner revealed the actor had brought copious amounts of Viagra.

Unveiling the New Taste of Fall: The Foliage Spice Latte

Louisville X-Press Staff

Oct 6, 2021

Unveiling the New Taste of Fall: The Foliage Spice Latte

Pouring into coffee houses all over Louisville this season is, the new taste of fall will be the foliage spice latte!

Productivity Sky Rockets October 4th For Seemingly No Reason

Louisville X-Press Staff

Oct 4, 2021

Productivity Sky Rockets October 4th For Seemingly No Reason

In a day of miraculous, almost divine, change the world seems to have woken up from a deep trance and sleeping giant that is the global work

Dollar Tree Experiencing Existential Crises

Louisville X-Press Staff

Sep 30, 2021

Dollar Tree Experiencing Existential Crises

Imagine devoting your whole career to a principle, we personified the value of a dollar; we're about to show people what that's really worth

Village 8 Theater Launches Fuzzy, Dial-Up Streaming Service to Stay Competitive

Louisville X-Press Staff

Sep 24, 2021

Village 8 Theater Launches Fuzzy, Dial-Up Streaming Service to Stay Competitive

In a bid to stay more competitive, Village 8 Theater is launching a streaming service, allowing users to dial in to the theaters and stream.

Hot Pharmacist Derails Plans to Pick Up Valtrex Prescription

Louisville X-Press Staff

Sep 13, 2021

Hot Pharmacist Derails Plans to Pick Up Valtrex Prescription

The hottest pharmacist I've ever laid eyes on...

Pentagon Location Scouts Searching For Perfect Spot For Sequel to Afghanistan

Louisville X-Press Staff

Sep 6, 2021

Pentagon Location Scouts Searching For Perfect Spot For Sequel to Afghanistan

Hopeless Romantic HR Director Constantly Ghosted by Dates, Job Applicants

Louisville X-Press Staff

Aug 31, 2021

Hopeless Romantic HR Director Constantly Ghosted by Dates, Job Applicants

Illegal Street Horse Racing on the Rise in Louisville

Louisville X-Press Staff

Aug 16, 2021

Illegal Street Horse Racing on the Rise in Louisville

LMPD spokesperson Ofc. Beth Ruoff reports that the streets of Louisville have gotten a little more dangerous at night. But it's not...

Louisville Retailers Announce Masks Now Required When Shopping Online

Louisville X-Press Staff

Aug 12, 2021

Louisville Retailers Announce Masks Now Required When Shopping Online

Target, Wal-Mart, Best Buy, and Amazon are among the major retailers who have announced that red zone areas for Covid cases will now...

New Website Finally Allows Feline Content Creators to Gain Followers, Make Money

Louisville X-Press Staff

Aug 8, 2021

New Website Finally Allows Feline Content Creators to Gain Followers, Make Money

New Website Finally Allows Feline Content Creators to Fain Followers, Make Money

Discount Hospital to Offer Value Pricing

Robert J. Bornstein

Aug 3, 2021

Discount Hospital to Offer Value Pricing

Citing a need for more consumer-friendly marketing, discount hospital McLouisville Medical is moving towards a value pricing system to...